Don’t talk to me about Buckley’s. As a matter of fact . . . don’t even look in my general direction when the concept of Buckley’s floats through your mind . . . it is all just too terrible – seriously.

Buckley’s is a joke of a cough syrup from our hilarious neighbors to the north (Canada) . . . and taking it is like licking a dollop of Vick’s mentholated rub off of a strip of fly paper that has been steeping in a cup of gasoline(ated) turpentine. It is bad bad bad in ways that I can’t even figure out – so heed my experience as a warning.

I had been sick for a few days and the normal ways of kicking the sickness to the curb weren’t quite working out (you know that I am talking all about you Dayquil/Nyquil knock out combo) . . . and so I took the advice of a fellow coworker and went on a mission to find some of what he called “Some really terrible stuff.”

At first – I couldn’t find it anywhere – but I became more focused when a worker at a store said “Oh – people are buying up all of the Buckley’s . . .” when I asked here where I could find it. What was this magic medicine – that I had never heard of – that people were in such a rush to buy?! I absolutely had to have some of this nasty stuff so that it could make me all kinds of better.

When I finally got my hands on some, I laughed at the slogan on the bottle “It tastes awful. And it works.” I mean come on – it was just some in the aisle medicine – how bad could it be?! Then I took it out of it’s box and marveled at the translucent brown bottle with the pearlecent white liquid with a blue-ish tinge that I was holding in my hand. I then took a one and one-half teaspoon swig from the bottle.

Everything went blank for me at that point as the ferocious swill ate it’s way down my throat – causing me into a fit of jerks and gaggles as it went. All that I can figure is that I was completely destroyed and rebuilt from the ground up when I took a taste . . . lacking only the cold that had been sticking with me . . . I was a whole and better person – albeit with a really bad taste in my mouth that I can still conjure up a week later . . .

And then 4 (four) hours later – when the dosage wore off – the coughing came right back . . . and it was time to take another sip.

So please . . . don’t even talk to me about Buckley’s – whatever you do. . . because it is more than – more than kind of – kind of yucky – blea-uuuuugh - blug - blug - blug - amo-cabo-uch-uch-uch.

Tags: Update

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